When one spouse needs assisted living, it can feel like a challenging and emotional crossroads for a couple and their family. Often, spouses can be at different stages of their senior living journey. Balancing the physical, emotional, and practical aspects can help families navigate this transition successfully.
Here’s a roadmap of what you can do when one spouse needs assisted living:
- Recognize the signs that assisted living may be necessary.
- Have open and honest communication with your spouse and other family members.
- Take time to research and visit a senior community.
- Prepare for the move.
- Support the spouse remaining at home.
- Stay connected and involved in each other’s lives.
What Is Assisted Living?
Assisted living offers a blend of housing, personal care, and health services tailored to individual needs. It provides support with daily activities, such as bathing, dressing, or managing medications. These communities provide a safe, comfortable environment that fosters independence while making sure necessary care and support are always available.
What To Do When One Spouse Needs Assisted Living?
When only one spouse needs assistance with daily living, this new chapter often brings up questions about how to care for the spouse needing additional support while meeting the other spouse’s needs. The right approach and resources can answer those questions.
Recognizing the Need for Assisted Living
Certain signs may indicate it’s time to consider assisted living. These signs could include:
- Increasing difficulty with daily tasks (e.g., cooking, cleaning, bathing).
- Frequent falls or challenges with mobility.
- Memory loss that impacts daily functioning.
- Health conditions that require 24/7 supervision or specialized care.
- A caregiving spouse who’s overwhelmed or unable to keep up with the care required.
Communication & Decision-Making
Open and honest conversations are the foundation of a smooth transition. Begin by sitting down together and discussing the needs of the spouse who requires support. Here’s how you can approach this conversation:
- Acknowledge feelings: Understand that this decision is emotional for everyone involved. Allow space for fears or hesitations to be shared.
- Focus on well-being: Frame the conversation around the health, safety, and comfort of your loved one needing care.
- Consider the other spouse: Discuss practical concerns for the spouse remaining at home or moving into another senior living level of care. Their peace of mind and support system are just as important.
- Collaborate: Where possible, involve both spouses in the decision-making process, as well as other close family members.
Choosing the Right Assisted Living Community
Here’s a checklist to help you identify an assisted living community that’s fit for your loved one:
- Location: Is it conveniently situated for family visits and close to the spouse remaining at home?
- Services: Does the community offer the level of care your loved one requires? Are there options for the other spouse to live in the community as well?
- Trained staff: Are the caregivers qualified, attentive, and compassionate?
- Atmosphere: Tour a community to see if it feels homely, welcoming, and vibrant?
- Activities and amenities: Does the community offer engaging activities and spaces where families can gather for visits and celebrations?
Preparing for the Move
Once you’ve selected the assisted living community in Atlanta, it’s time to prepare for the move. Here’s how to make the process as smooth as possible:
- Sort belongings together and identify items that will make the new living space feel comforting (e.g., photos or meaningful keepsakes).
- Label boxes clearly to ease the unpacking process.
- Add familiar touches like bedding, artwork, or plants to make their new environment feel like home.
- Offer emotional reassurance. Acknowledge feelings of worry or sadness and emphasize the benefits of this transition.
Supporting the Spouse from Home
The spouse staying at home also needs support to adjust. Here are some ways to make sure they’re cared for during this time:
- Use support services: Consider meal delivery, transportation, or house cleaning services to lighten their load.
- Prioritize social connections: Encourage involvement in community groups or regular visits with friends and family.
- Focus on self-care: Remind them that their physical and emotional well-being is just as important. Encourage hobbies, exercise, and rest.
Adjusting to Assisted Living
The transition into assisted living takes time for everyone to adjust. Encourage the following steps to stay connected and support each other despite the physical separation:
- Plan frequent visits: Regular time together sustains the bond and eases the sense of separation.
- Utilize community spaces: Take advantage of shared areas within the assisted living community for family gatherings or activities.
- Stay involved: Follow up on your loved one’s care plan, attend facility events, and stay engaged with their daily happenings.
- Explore new routines: Use this opportunity to create new habits, such as weekly video calls or sending handwritten letters.
Consider Moving to a Senior Living Community Together
Something important to consider is the option for both spouses to move into a senior living community together. Some communities, like Holbrook Decatur, offer a range of senior living levels of care, where one spouse can receive the assistance and care they need, and the other can enjoy living in the same community in the Active Adult (independent) living neighborhood.
At Holbrook in Decatur, many spouses thrive in our community with one spouse in Enriched (assisted living) or Inspired Living (memory care), and the other in Active Passionate (independent) living. Many couples prefer this option, as it allows them to live together in the same community, enjoying the same luxury amenities and activities together, while also receiving the customized level of care that they need as individuals.
Enriched Living at Holbrook
At Holbrook, our assisted living communities offer an enriching experience, with a wealth of exciting luxury amenities available to our residents. Our goal is to provide a thoughtful, beautiful community setting with safety as a priority. We aim to help our residents stay independent longer, and provide the tools they need to live and enjoy their lives, without stressing about the little things.
Our residents get to focus on living a life filled with adventure, activity, good food, socialization, and much more.
Taking Steps Toward Assisted Living with Confidence
The decision to move a partner into an assisted living community is never easy but done with love, care, and the intention to provide quality care, both spouses can find a way to thrive—one with the care they need and the other with peace of mind and support.
If you’re currently in this situation and need guidance, our team is here to help. Contact Holbrook Decatur for personalized advice and support during this time.
